Emeka way dey study banking nd finance Don dey sell power bank infront of bank.
ASUU abeg nauð
Short people re the reason why children shoe’s re expensive
ðð
SUBMIT A PRAYER REQUEST TODAY ... Don't IGNOREÂ ââââ Since I comot hand for relationship matter
I Don dey fat.ð
ð
Small garri small eyedrop, na so I dey do am since make person no go blindð
Me as a Lawyer: My Lord no dey shout for me na person I come defend, no be me thief the plantainðð€£ð€£
I first removed her bra and shifted her pant na so I take see space hang my cloth for wire this morning ð
Whether small or big, your role as a woman is to scream when it enters the house…. A snake is a snake ð
Wen jusus d entr temple wit cane, pple tink say he wan use am as parable, until nwanyi okpa hear “Nwin” for her back. Oso emmeðð
In Nigeria a lady can love u with all her heart and still marry who is ready.
ð
Everybody da give fluent speech,Tinub..come with him paper like oko studentð€£ð€£
Come dey shake hand join
Omo I “take the bull by the horn”” as una dey always talk am,
Bull Don use me knack for ground Oo
ðð
Na hospital i dey
Dating a married man is very stressful. Smal quarrel e Don post his wife and pikin wit Caption “My true happiness”
ð
Allow somebody’s son to date uð
Those bwess won’t press themselvesð
We moveð
Full meaning of PANTS.
“Private Areas need tight security”
They won’t teach u diz one in school.
ððogbasadimð¶
5Alive is now 500 naira…
100naira per Alive
ð€
If you’re short you can’t make heaven, because you have come short the glory of God.
ð
Na my number u block for ur babe phone no be my leg.
ð¶
Who else noticed say food no dey last long again for belle
ð€
If she visit nd sit on the chair nd she’s too shy to come to bed.
Just take a picture of her,
She will come nd checkð And………
Since I comot hand from women wit big yansh my life just dey go smoothly.
ðð
Her:- Baby am not fineð
Me:- Do make up nauð
Why dis Barber dey use hot towel?
Na #300 I get oh
ð
Wahala is when you innocently save the number of the woman that supplies you honey as HONEY and while the phone is with your wife, Honey sends a text message – “Tomorrow’s own will be sweeter than what you got last week”.ð
Onions is nice and very healthy.
But please, do not smell like it.
You book a hotel room for 50k, and gave her 5k while leaving
Why not Give her the 50k and do it in the bush?
M.a.d people!ð¶ð»ââïžð¶ð»ââïžð¶ð»ââïž
Men don’t cheat, they just want to know the difference between IFEOMA and IJEOMAðð€ª
The M in man stands for money
While the W in woman stands for withdrawal
Is d volume ok? ð¶ð¶ð¶ð¶
The coat wey I cut according to my size don Dey tight me oh ð¥¹
Pls how can someone deal with husband that cannot sleep without breast in his mouth asking for a friend
“I Like It Rough”
Don Hit Head For Bed Frame come faint ðð€²ð»
Before u post Beauty with Brains please block us ur course matesð€£ð¶ð»ââïži no wan call names
Encourage me wit credit Alert wic one be “Keep pushing”
I tell u say I get Belle?
ð
Don’t look at the size just put it…it will enter slowly some shoes re like DAT
ð
Where do ladies get T.fare from wen they hear their boyfriend is wit another girl?
ð€ð
Android phne cn be so anoyin. Jst got a notification dt my bible needs an update, for wat?
Has Adam eaten anoda apple again?ðð
I am writing a break up latter Now. Can someone help me in spelling, enimo. As in” I can’t take it no enimo ” ðððð
The way girls love money nowadays.
I ask myself was it really Judas dat sold Jesus or it was Judith.
ð€
Let me motivate you people small
Envy No man, his trouser may look good but his Boxer Might Have holes…Be Contentedðð
GUESS MY BATHING SOAP AND STAND A CHANCE TO BATH WITH ME
https://web.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=4848784655244056&set=a.113623535426882
Women re they only gender dat meet the Devil one on one,
Wat they discuss I don’t knowð
One girl com do home delivery for my area since yesterday she never comotâŠ.I see her this evening she wan go fill gas ð
How Satan take enter Garden of Eden sef.
Abi Angel’s no dey gateð.
Diz story no clearð
Me as a pharmacist:
Bros u fit vomit dat medicine, I Don do small mistake
I confess my sins for church on Sunday
Pastor call policeð
A foolish man complains of his torn pocket, while a wise man uses it to scratch his
balls
ð
Sometimes, I don’t write anything in my exam sheet because I know silent is the best answerð
Wen Anambra girl tell u ” i am Solly”
U”ll be wondering if she’s introducing herself or apologising
ðð
Wahala be like Anambra English.
Move reft , go stlaight , then
turn light , u will see the bakely by the reft
ðððððððððð
Once a Lady get married, every other girl around her become “runs girl”
meanwhile they were both in active service before she retiredð¶
Na love and attention u tell me ooð
Were I won see 50k for wigðð
Big bress is fine in clothes only. But small bress fine wen naked”
Tangerine owner Don drop Quoteðð
He rape u but u suck dick.
Favour ” I no understand diz storyline at all ooðð
Don’t ask me for any Relationship adviceð.
Am single, and I support heartbreakððð¶ð¶
Wen u eat cucumber wit banana u becum “Cubana”
No nutritionist will tel u dizð
Mek nobody use tomorrow threaten you. Na God get am, no be their papa.
One deceptive character about abusive men is that, they are very friendly and nice to people outside but beast to their wives at home
Only their wives can tell their true character.
Never judge a Divorcee.
Na who wear shoe Sabi where e dey pain am.
One polo 15kð³
Una plan for this Nigeria na to see my Nakedness
ð
She refuse to marry him because of his surname ONUAMU she don’t want people to start calling her MRS ONUAMU…
This Gender eee
A virtuous woman is the one who shaves her armpit and apply deodorant, there’s nothing virtuous about smelly armpit. ð
Ashebi 50k,
For this ur husband way no fine
ð
I blame myself for keeping chair in my roomð
Come bed she no greeðð
I remember when Vaseline was just a body cream. But now people use it to make way where thereâs no way ð
If Ur Parents Know Some Of D Things U Have Licked
They Wont Let U Use Their Spoonðð€²ð»
If u finish ur Education in Nigeria without handwork, u will understand why Nigerian Anthem stop with
“So help me God”
ð
All of u wey dey sleep naked for night make una dey pity una guardian angel nau
ðð
Avoid men that tear bread nylon..
Na them they spoil bra pass.
ð
But this country shaa
Boys dey drink bitters, girls dey use sweetener’s
All for same matter
ðð
If weapon wey dem fashion against me get Big nyash E Don prosper oooðð
ð
Pls ooð
I misplaced my glasses diz morning in case u see me in ur Relationship abeg no vex I no dey see well againð
If ur secret dey wit me come and buy me food
I no fit dey carry ur secret up & down wit empty stomach
ð
I ON Gen for U, you still dey ask if I love u.
ð
No sex position makes a man faithful,
my sister don’t destroy your kidney
U enter bike go warn person way dey Drive lexus to stay away from ur babe
ðð Some guys shaa
Ur Boyfriend dey call u princess u dey shine teethð
U no ask who be Queen
ðð
For a relative to assist you by means of connection etc,such a person doing that for you must be under an extraordinary power,
God.
The last time I stood up for my right.
Na right hand dem use wose me Slapð
S*x is too early but Transfer is not too early?
Awww Armed Robber & more
A Man’s SHOES Should Match His BELT, Says A Slay Queen Who’s Face Doesn’t Even Match Her Neck. ð
The creator made WOMAN to please the Eye and trouble the Mind.
ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£
Don’t lose that woman if her nyash softð.
ððð
Because I no get money u say ur own period dey last two months.
Chioma u get brodas ooð
I can’t drive u crazy anymore oo, omo petrol is now #250 per literðð
May the iron in their bra never kill Dem be4 their time Ebube own nearing wound am today INUKWA package ð©ð©ððð
E get the kind stress u go face for life,,
Low cut go just dey sweet u to barbð
You complain of our leaders being corrupt but the little chance given to you to share rice in occasion you passed me ð nonsense
Never lend money to people born on MAY.
Cuz they may or may not pay u backð
Back then in school nothing sweet me like u have not paid ur school fees go home ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ðð€žðŸââ
She used face lock for her password, now she don wash her makeup ð
Phone no gree open again ð€·ð
Nyash way I flog for primary school Don they enter my eyes oo
ðð
My phone never crack since I buy am imaging if u give me ur heartâ€ð€
There has never been Beer scarcity in Nigeria
It’s high time FG hand over NNPC to Nigerian Breweries to ensure adequate supply
As e be like this if you send me money now I fit marry you ð€²ð»ð©
Even Satan who’s duty is to lie can’t ask u to invest 10k and get 100k in 40minute
ðð
If you see toilet in your dream please don’t use it… Please don’t use it ððð I will explain when am done washing my bedsheetsð¥
ODOGWU Are Men Who Take Care Of Their Women, While The Rest Are ODIEGWU.
ððððð
Is d volume ok???
If wedding vows include may u die the day u cheat.
Will u still marry
ðð
Some bress have settled down
But the owner is still single and searching
ð
That moment
she hears her husband
is in a hotel with another woman.
ððððððððððð (Speed Meme Here)
So we no fit take the gospel at d hotel Again
Aunty He’s toasting u & u are asking him if he doesn’t have a gf. Let me ask u, have u ever seen some1 going to buy clothes naked?
I don’t know why Hotel towels re so Big now my bag zip has spoilt
ðð
ð Naija girls codes and Meaningsð:.
1 Ode :- my love
2 Big head:- fine boy
3 it’s fine:- stop it
4 I’m leaving soon oo:- we suppose Don dey knack by now.
5 what:- I’m about to get angry.
6 Nvm:- I Don vex.
7 Hope ur girlfriend will not kill me:- Are you singleðð
Keke wey i enter today go jam Mercedes GLK 350 all of us runðð including the keke manððð
The way I am going to kiss my wife on the wedding day even her Dad will be angry.
ðð
Where others go and fail.
Igadi very careful.
ðð
I done go use foreign number register my Jamb now my Center dey UKRAINE
ðð
Girl wey I like cum send am 2k bcuz she get big nyash, Don tel me say na foam she use ooðð
How person go hold 700k phone and still get body odour??ð€·ðŒââïž
Misplaced priority ni.
Roll on is just #650ð¶ð»ââïž
DM if u fit Date broke guy.
I go use Love finish youð
FLAT tummy won’t matter in heaven
Eat for the journey is farð
ð¶ð¶ð¶
Me:- baby I Buyed u somfin.
Bae;- Lol is not Buyed its Boat.
Me:- ððð
Which one is “Father lord as I want to sleep come & sleep with me” Sister na ashawo dey your eye abi na English be your problem ðð
Wahala for who leave Nigeria go school for Ukraine oo. Better make ASUU strike me than Missile ooð
ð
Nowadays them go first do plenty things for your waist before them do small thing on your head…ððð daughters of zion
Small money enter my hand u don dey call me Blood.
Unblood me abeg I be AA you be SS
The mood wey I dey now not even Alert will chear me up but send am fess make we see
ðð
Conrgatulations ð
ðfor not reading the first word correctly
ðð
When God told all the animals to respect humans,I don’t think mosquito attend the meeting ð ð.
Ihe nkea obu wetin
There are some sex styles that are automatically a sin even when you’re married.
You want to kill each otherâwetin my eyes see ee
ð€
Some of u ladies are single because when men look at ur stomach they think u are pregnant…
pls eat with caution ð
Everywhere done silent.
Una don dey knack Abi.
ðð
The way you dey fear diçk na the same way I dey fear transfer
No prejur me!
My virginity is coming back small small I can feel it.
ð
Second wife Don turn first wife to lesbian.
Now Husband dey single inside marriage
ðð
If dem check my body system now I sure say Garri done plenty pass Bloodðð
God help me
Soon them go buy gift for themselves, snap it and post “Wow! Wow!! Valentine Gift from boo” Boo wey never chop since morning ð
The day you scratch a big man’s car, just pray he is not in the car with two or three of his friends who depend on him for their livelihood
Those ones no dey hear abegð€£my story
Them Don marry all the wife material finish na harder harder remain
ðð
Some girls re still trying to figure how they will be in 7places on Valentine’s day
ððð
Every cheating story is about men but once you mention DNA na women dey faint… Isn’t God wonderful ð€£ð€£ð€£
Plumber wey Dem Carry come repair kitchen sink
Don warm jollof rice say him get ulcer ð
I look like Iâm okay but deep down, I want Valentineâs gift.
Even if itâs water gùn or agege bread.ð
All these Gals dat canât kneel down jus for 5mins 2pray,but can kneel For two hours doin doggy style,even d devil wil not 4Give u
I just finished reading the Bible….Wetin Satan do no really good. If person see truth make e dey talk am ð
We men na peace of mind we dey find o..no be big yansh & bress.
Buh if u still get am RUGGED YOU
ð
Sometimes i feel like going to Kilimanjaro and crunches but when i remember how i suffer get the money i turn backð
My dear Don’t let any guy deceive you that you look like Angel.
Angel no dey bleach ð
Is the volume ok……
Avoid crime in this harmattan because it’s only singlet you will wear in police station ð€£
Imagine you’re showing ur wife something on ur phone nd a message enter “why did u release inside me yesterday”ðð€
Girls with round face would go and do heavy makeup and end up looking like digestive biscuit
ððð
No be to cry during worship, you go gree change? ð
Ndi Pharisee
Imaging putting loveð portion in ur boyfriend food and Ratð¿ mistakenly eat it nd start following u up and down
ðð
you are fasting and u are opening fridge
are u looking for praying points
ðððððð
Some men intentionally cause problems at home so they could go out to have fun in the name of “anger.”ð
My sister no gree o!
To do ritual no hard, buh to obey Baba instruction na d issue…wic one be “Don’t laugh on Saturday” wat if Man U lose?
WAHALA
Madam dial oga number with house girl phone, na sweet heart show.. ð³
I need a Relationship as strong as Nokia 3310. Am tired of all diz Android & iPhone luv.
Just small fal screen don break
ðð
They want their daughters with kids to marry but don’t Want their sons to marry single mumðMad oh!ð¶ð¶
While praying for a good husband please pray to have sense too.. You can’t wear suit with bathroom slippers!!
Abeg make una send me 2k take hold body,
Eyeð dey turn una Future Husbandð
ð
The energy wey I put for Love if I use am learn Mechanic I for don sabi Repair Planeð©
Going to the mountain to pray and taking selfieâs shows the issues that took you there are not serious..ððð
One tin u should take in2 consideration wen approaching a lady.
D longer d skirt, D longer d Relationship.
Flyover agbasadimð¶
Stop posting old pictures, if u re no longer Hot,
REST!
I no wan mention names
I hear say wife material don put maggi for custard
ð
âI don knack amâ wonât stop people from marrying them.
Just so you know ð
If youâre depressed, talk to me.
If itâs about money, weâre both depressed.
Never feel bad when your friends are becoming ur enemies, they are tired of pretending. ð
2 days ago in my compound.
There is this guy living with his girlfriend. They are so romantic.
I and others do gossip about their relationship
I have been telling people in my compound that love doesn’t last these day, one day they will break up
I was inside my room today, suddenly I heard them quarreling.
The guy said to the girl “Do you know I can sIap you?
The girl replied “SIap me na, I will teach you a lesson
*Me and others were busy peeping from our houses, waiting for them to fight so that we can laugh at them
But after few minutes, they stopped quarreling. We were confused
Then the next statement I heard was the guy telling the girl “Baby, do you want Kpomo or fish
Me:
What is all these? ððð
Just coming back from the ATM to withdraw N1000 for dinner
On my way home, I met with a Jehovahâs Witness. After preaching to me, they invited me to their church on Sunday and handed me a paper.
As soon as i left there, I folded the paper and threw it away.
Getting to where Iâll buy food, I noticed it was my N1000 i threw away and i was left with the paper Jehovah witness gave me.
Now Iâm having headache all over my body ð
I’m tired of paying rent ð³ tomorrow am moving to the church since it’s my father’s house ð
Anyone who traveled on your behalf for evil will never return ððŸ
When I brake plate in front of visitors.
MOM:- ð
Once dey leave Ewoooo (Sabinus Boxing Meme)
Teachers are the only workers who beat their customers
ð
So u mean girls can press bress anytime dey like cuz na dem get am
ð
Mk una fear the Creator
Babe I am tired of skin to skin, let’s do soul to soul
ð€
U nd who
At least shaaa 4kids re okay..2boys and 2 urgent 2k.
ð
A boyfriend that doesn’t press ur bress wen kissing has no plan for marriageð
ðð
Marriage is finding that special person u want to annoy for the rest of your lifeðââïž
People won’t raise 1 kobo for u to start a biz nor pay hospital bills when sick but same people won’t mind donating even 1m for your burial ð€
This life no balance ð€·ââïž
Lol.. I jam my pastor for restaurant now we begin laugh bcuz we supposed dey fast
ðð
As I no fit win person pikin heart..
Make I kukuma win souls for Christ.. Give your life to Christ now…
ð
Using sir for a man when you deeply know that he’s in love with you is witchcraft (Hellfire)
Your boyfriend already knows who he wants to marry,if you like stay in the kitchen and be shouting
“Baby semo or rice?”
Me i prefer Rice biko
Never u go out to jog without transport money na wheelbarrow they carry me come back this morning from joggling
As u dey fear preeq na so me too dey fear Transfer no prejor me
ð
I paid 10k for a seminar on how to make millions,,
Na okada carry dey organiser come the venue
ðð
Person wey come meet me for help Today Later Dash Me 1k After We Talk Finish ð¥ºð
January menses has begun. Just in case u ain’t seeing yours. Call the big guy u go Bamba with, else u go run Kitikitið
U are scared of buying things online
But not scared of going to see a man or inviting ghost to ur house
If Ur GF was able to Cheat in an exam hall wit 8 invigilators, 4 policemen, 6 CCTV Cameras.
My Brother Who are U??
I wounder why women call it menstruation instead of womenstruation. They like shifting all their problems to men
The stretch marks on some people’s body can wire 3story building.ðððððð
Don’tât confuse movement with progress! Examine yourself daily and be real to yourself.
Why do vehicles increase speed
When they are about to drop their passengers Only legend can Understand ð
— Because the passenger will be shouting harder baby harder
January can be so harsh some people will be looking for house rent, school fees and money for food stuff and some will be looking for their period.ð€·ðŒââïžððŒââïž
I want my Relationship to be like those couple in CABIN BISCUIT.
They have been smiling since my childhoodð
I will be smiling thinking about my life then suddenly a girl will just pass without Bra,
Voom! Memory wipedð
Odikwa egwu ooh!ð
When you help other people succeed your success flows naturally!!
If I dey enter your eyes Biko don’t close it, tell me, I wan marry this year.
He kissed ur forehead doesn’t mean He’s romantic ðHe may be avoiding ur mouth odour
ðð
2022 if doors don’t open, we are getting through the window, we are winning beyond every situation by fire by fire.. ððð
U only hv 2 okirika pants and he is askin “wat can i buy 4 u”? And u ar sayin iPhone. Sister ur village piple ar strong oðð
Person come for HIV test u still collect number!!!
Amaliri Chidiebere why?ð¥Žð¥Ž
I can die for u babe..
But small injection all the nurse dey hold uððð
Doctor: u can’t sell both kidney, u will dieðð
Me: No be u go tell me wetin I go doð¶ð¶
No be every girl way dey wear long gown be born again…some dey cover stretch marks, green veins, eczema and k legð
God comot my rib create u, I no vex.
Now remove ur clothes make see watin him create e turn wahala.
Even with Condom I will still Use speed pull out
I no like wahala
I dey get trust issue
Na wife I dey find like this
I Don pass dating stage
Never re-friend a person that has tried to destroy you once.
A snake only sheds it’s skin to become a bigger snakeððð
What if Satan decides to repent will GOD forgive Her
?
ð
Na bread Jesus share he no do transfer,,
I no wan do pass my Lord ðdiz Xmas
ð¶
Some ladies re busy packing their luggage to go spend Xmas wit a stranger.
“I don’t want to hear justice for Ebube Blessing Ejiofor Ooð
Thank God say adam and eve chop that fruit na so we for de waka naked for this cold,cold for don enter my bodyð
since i pick dis #500 for ground my body have been doing me somehow as if I want to turn to fowl
ð€ð€ð€ð€ð€ð€ð€
I don’t know why my neighbours stopped rearing chickens and started rearing local fowl’s.these local fowl’s speed too much abegð
Sometimes I feel depressed in life but when I look out and consider people in worst situations than me, I cheer up and have hope.
Go to hospitals and see people living on drugs. They cannot stay a day without drugs and these drugs are costly.
Consider people that are crippled but they still manage to survive
Consider people that are blind but they still manage to survive
Consider people that are asthmatic but they still manage to survive
Consider people that are surviving on oxygen.
Consider people that don’t have homes and are begging in the street.
You failed jamb many times? Consider people that have not stepped their foot in a classroom since they were born
There are so many problems on Earth.
When ever you feel depressed, always know there are many people out there in worst situations than yours.
Don’t let depression make you commit suicide
Suicide does not take the pain away. It passes it to someone else
Your loved ones will always feel the pain.
Cheer up! Someday everything will be fine.
All I remember in maths is “Are we Together”ðð
Therapist:- it’s like u fall in love easily?
ME:- yes my loveð
Ladies, if you’re lucky to have a good man that is financially buoyant, don’t use him
Add value to his life, help him get more.
Try to have a real relationship.
You didnât come to this world to nack.
Father Christmas don carry church bell run ooh
Una say wahala be like watin
never allow ur husband to pray silently he might be asking God for another wife
ðððððð
Ladies be talkin abt makeup like d re abt to go to war.”Wat eyeliner is dat? Its d latest Mac 452Ak47 suprem blend zero 10 mascað
Whoever I owe sex should inbox me sharply.
I don’t wanna enter 2022 with debtð
I wish I had a girlfriend,
I just dey see fine bags and shoes here and there.
But no one to buy it for!
Man: I really love you but if you want this relationship to work, you need to stop eating Okpa
Enugu girl: (Add Funny Face)
I can sense that 2022 is gonna be a year of ownership!U must own some stuff in ur name! Receive it now and start naming them. Amen
Wahala for chickenð wey no sabi runðthis December
ðððððððð
Those who are waiting for you to call for help so they could put their phone on loud speaker and mock you, shall wait in vain.
Maturity is when you understand that he loves you but he can’t date you alone…
ðð
One #Gucci_pant cost 200k and you expect her to sit and close her legs¿¿ð³
You must be very wicked! My sister open am as wide as possible jor,let them see what God has done for you
ðððððððð
Please, before you embark on weight loss, check the size of your head to avoid looking like car keys.
Ordinary Teeth You Will Not Brush, Small Kiss Your Saliva Will Be Testing Like Expired Battery. ðð
Sugar mummy wey promise Leonard Okere brand new car for December don give her life to Christ. ððœââïžððœââïžð€£ð€ªð
Nyash no get teeth but e dey cut shitð
Follow með¶ on more quotesð
The problem With many girls is that,they think Adam used to give Eve money
ð
Once u start talking to me wit no Bra that’s wen I’ll start getting ur Point
ð
Plss is it true that Suya reduce menstruation pains? Or has Ebube scammed með
DECEMBER BREAKUP JUST THIS MORNING..
Bae why did u sweep my room wit broom wen u know I support “PDP”
its overðð¶
Even P-square are back together â
Satan swallow your pride go beg God na ðð
ððð¶
If ur dad own a gas station & ur mum sells provision & foodstuffs, DM me for serious relationship that will lead to marriage ðð
Always visit your boyfriend on skirt, e get why ðð
ððð¶
Some guys are like bag of weed, u love him but can’t introduce him to your parents ððWHY?
ððð¶
There are families going into December with nothing, Dear God may you provide for their needs ðð»â€ïžâš
Abeg from next week, any fowl dat passes my front is at owners risk.
Train ur fowl to stay at a place & stop slaying aroundðð
*As long as u’re not moneyð° don ‘t worry u’re not my problem.
IGBO BOYS BE LIKE
“Hello baby, I just landed in Nigeria now”
Igbo girls :- Gini mezie?
Ejim ur house key..ð
Ashawo wey dem carry come for deliverance don tell pastor Longest time
ð
Wetin una talk say wahala be like?
Who remembers those days when we entertained visitors with our albums at home? ð Now, all they want is phone charger…ð
Stop putting hope on relatives if you want to go far in life.
Most of them only assist during funerals.
Ladies Feed Your Man Well. Fat Men Can’t Run Away! ð€£ð€£ð€£
Nothing pain like swallowing a stolen meat without chewing it thinking that someone is coming e dey pain
ðððð€£ð€£ð€£
Nigerian math’s be like,
Example:-2+2=4
Classwork: if a room have 4 doors and 6 windows how old is ur Landlord?ð
ð
Abeg make una drop motivational quote for me ooð
My gas just finished and na beans I dey cookð
Wat Aba cannot do does nt existð
After washin d Shirt I bought frm Aba, the crocodile on d Shirt decided to stay in the waterðð
Same guy that told you he will change your life
Only has 3 boxers the whole year
ðð
No matter how long you have known someone.
Once you realized they are messing with your peace of mind, let them go.
Marriage is really sweet for men.They will come home, eat the food and later eat the person that cooked the foodð
Some ladies are lonely and single because when their heart said yes,their friends said babe
This guy is below your standard
If alcohol was to be banned in Nigeria, many people would realize they have nothing in common with their friends.
He toast u, you no gree.
You asked him for money, He refused, you dey vex
No be person wey get Admission dey pay school fees?ð
Please guys which other document do I need for my USA visa I have my waec and nepa bill already, am tired of this country ð
BAE :Huni am coming over
ME :I can’t wait
BAE ð but am on my period o*
ME ð dats why I said I can’t wait cuz am going sumwhere ð
ðð
Na pastor way fit turn water to cooking Gas
Na him church I wan dey go nowð
Omoh, Aboniki balm just mistakenly entered my eyes
I am now seeing everything as God made them ð
Madam stop moving around the compound with a wrapper on ur chest ur husband do not marry a cultural dancer biko ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð
Hm diz my neighbo self
Return my virginity & my standing breast if u want a divorce, I hear my neighbour telling her Husbandð
ð
Interviewer:- Why should I give u this job?
Dechris:- if u no give me, na u go do amð
Don’t take social media so serious, we play here. Even if you’re ugly we say “Wow!! So cute” just for you to avoid depression….Shebi you get mirror ð
That guy that texts you only when you post a fine photo doesnât love you.
He is horny and wants to fornicate. ð¶ââïžð¶ââïž
Am tired of building relationships….Any uncompleted one i see now na to roof am and park in quickly ð
My mom kept fish under the table I ate it, now she’s asking me to check if the Rat ð is dead.ð where is Red oil
ðð
Better soup na girl wey sabi cook make am, no be Money.
Some girls can cook rubbish even with 30k.
ðAru mere
To win Edo girls heart you just need to have a car even if na ambulance ð
This year made you strong.
Next year is going to make you happy.
Relationship are for strong people lemme just focus on food
God will judge u, I said God will judge u, DAT is me testing micð€at my Ex weddingð
Before u call any girl a prostitute
Check if Your mama get wedding pictureð€£ð€£ð€£
E get why!!!
If you want to make enquiry about a lady you want to date or marry , get to her and find out yourself
Stop asking people questions about her because you may end up asking someone that is jealous of her , A family member that does not want her to progress or someone that wants to have you.
Any of these people can make her look needless in your sight.
When he said “I AM JOSEPH” his brothers were shocked. May God repackage us and reintroduce us to those who wrote us off.
Amen! Good morning everyone.â€
One delivery guy just called me now and asked if I am the person that ordered for fried rice and shawarma, I said “YES” and gave him my location
He is on his way
Na to reap where I did not sow dey hungry me now
Most times this people av no reason2dump u.They only saw a bigger bress&rememberhow ur soup was salty in 1993ð¢ð
Na Emeka wey no get money them the call “Mekus” u see this once wey get money, girls the call them “Emmy”.
ðð
I only wanted to be an adult cuz of 2 meat’s.
All this bills I didn’t sign for it ooð
ðð
When someone decided to leave you,
Please let them go,
People are like clothes!
You can never be Naked no matter how Poor you’re.
Belivð¯
“Wow, you have the voice of an Angel”
Some guys will just be saying rubbish, which day you follow Angel talk? ð
How long re u going to continue hiding ur stomach wit purse wen taking pictures
ð
Should I mention their names
U dey inside police van dey wave með
Which day dat friendship start???
ððð
Dn’t be a borin wife.once in a while wen ur mother inlaw is around go naked & touch ur bumbum & say.Mama diz wat ur son is enjoyin
Anytime I remember I am still a virgin,
Tears fall from my eyesð
ðð
If you cannot control yourself while single, you can’t control yourself while married.
MARRIAGE doesn’t cure lust
SELF CONTROL DOES!ð¯.
I was Able to overcome but but butðð
May we never be useless like the radio in our Android phoneð
To serve Nigeria with all my strength, I no serve again. If Nigeria no get strength make Dem go gym or drink blue bullet. I don tire
Promote your friends business with the same passion you
use to leak their secrets
ð
Who stone me
Na Solomon wey no wise Dem dey call Solo ð
Everyone is wiser when it’s not their story..
Na you get body odour, na you dey ask “who dey breeth”
Who wan breath for where you dey ð
They did not explain this adulthood thing to us very well oo
Being an adult is not easy …
When you have finished paying all your bills and start thinking everything is okey, boom! Your Generator rope will cut. After fixing it, your gas will finish, after filling the gas, Mosquito will start disturbing you at night, you will have no option than to rush to the nearest supermarket and buy insecticide.
After buying insecticide, thinking everything is okey, rain will fall and your roof will start leaking
After fixing the roof , thinking everything is okey. You’ll go outside to sit, relax and receive fresh air
While relaxing, that’s when you will see Nepa people coming with their Hilux and two ladders , requesting for Nepa bill or they cut light
CHINEKE NNA !!!
No be e everything wey sweet person suppose chop even sugar dey cause diabetes
Good day Gentlemen and that gender that wanted Joseph to do small.ðð€
When its ur time,
Even ur mistake will Favour youð¯
Belivð
Greetings from here!
Only men search for true love while women search for who can take care of them,once u can take care of them,they are in loveð¶
I told her to stop coming wit her friend & she refused to listen..now her friend is coming without her.
ðð
‘
I saw my neighbor cooking beans with gas dis morning hmmm,I just greeted her and went inside to pick phone and called EFCC.
I can’t forget the day i dragged front seat with an external invigilator in a bus ,I didn’t even know he was an invigilator until I saw him in the exam hall and he said to me “come and seat at the front seat since you like the front seat. ð
It is finished
“You are not my type” don carry belle for aboki man wey dae sell suya oh
ðððð¿ðð¿
Not all Men of God in quote are real..some are herbalist ..Satanic, evil destiny snatchers …the list is endless….ð¶ð¶
Dating a nurse is never romantic at all, wen she looks into ur eye’s instead of seeing Love,
She See’s Malaria oo
ðð’
Small chat, you are already asking her “what are you wearing?”
Uncle is your cloth missing?
I tried the American style of reading and sipping juice.
I’m still in pageð 1 and juice don finishðŽ
If u see me wit sugar mummy
Plss mind ur business I also need iPhone 13
ð
A guy & her bae were eating Apple in d bus, d next tin we heard from d troublesome conductor was “Adam &Eve where una go dropðð
Dem cheat on u, u dey ask me “do I deserve dis?”
How I wan take know?
Make everybody cari him cross abegð
“D hustle is for mom”
“D hustle is for mom”
Mom drop 1k 4 room
Nigga move amðð
I Need 5K to breath well Today
Understand this.ð
Having 5 thousand friends is not bad but having few who can come to your rescue or stand for you is priceless.
Native doctor wey suppose hold rain at burial, say rain hold am for where him go buy materials ð
Problem no dey finish
Plss patronize me oo am selling Relationship fertilizer u meet today. Next week is ur wedding Affordable priceð€
Anyone who is not happy about what God is doing in your life, shall remain in sorrow forever.
ðð’
Please don’t test my Loyalty with bress..
I’ll fail woefully
ð
Convincing a lady who came to visit u to leave d livin rum & entr d bedrum is a skil dt shuld be added to a Man’s CVð
I attended a crusade somewhere at Owerri, when we were praying, someone tapped me and said: broda you will walk. I was surprise because I am not lame.ð After the program, I discovered they have stolen my t-fare. My people, I later WALKED.
Dear God ð
include our names in the next batch of people to be congratulated.
ð
ðïžð
ð
U bought slimming tea and you are drinking it with bread and sardine sister ðð»ââïž
What exactly do you really want to achieve?
‘
This morning our bus wanted to take off and a woman started preaching with the topic “prepare to meet God” i kukuma come down ð¥Ž
If Bress was meant to stand, it would have come wit bone”
Runs girl don drop quote
ð
You no get boyfriend you dey buy pantð
Who go remove amð€
ðð
My crush told me she need a cool guy, pls hw long should I continue to stay inside diz fridge?
ð.”Anam ablock zi ablock ooðð
At the exam hall.
Lecturer: why is ur booklet empty?
Me: sometimes silent is the best answer given to a foolð¶ð¶ð¶ð¶ð¶ð¶
Go to school, u say no, u done see twins nw and be telling dem dat d look face to face instead of d look at onceð
Me as a surgeon:
Boss u sure say u enter this theatre with liver?ð
The day I’ll enter plane ehhn
I’ll cut small cloud and put it inside nylon
ðððð
I am writing breakup letter
Someone should help me spell fallstraight
Asin this relationship Dey fallstraight me ð©ð©ð©ð©ð©
I tell you say I dey catch cold you said make I go drink hot tea.
No worry u go need data nd urgent 2kð
If you cheat, weâre done.
Donât tell meâLetâs fix thingsâ
Iâm not an engineer ð¶ðŒââïž
You wan collect bread on credit you still dey ask if na today own.. People get mind oh
ðð
After eating shawarma and coke alone in the bus u naw turn around and ask me “we’re we” we are in Soddom and Gomorrah ðð
Wicked people
My phone just fell off from the table now, just hope my Facebook friends are not injured.ð€ð€ðð¶ð¶
ð3months without seeing her period,
Hmmmm.
Maybe its network
Deeper life couples after making love
Husband:-tnkz huni, dat was so sweet.
Wife:-tnk god, the providerð
Ur shoe is fine .
American:-thank u.
British:-I Appreciate.
Naija:- na 100k u dey see so oh!!
ðð
Kissin ur husband wen his is asleep is one of d best gesture of luvð.
But naija women, oh my godð
D searchðtrousers pocket instead.
ð
Instead of buying slim tea, just support Arsenal and lose weight for free.
ME in court crushingð on a female judgeðž.
ME: Objectionðmy Love, sorry Lord
ðð
If u need a friend that will keep secret, I am here for u,
Even wen Oge told me dat she did Abortion did I tell anyone?
ð
Never allow ur wife to name ur male child. She might name him after her EX..thank you.
Am seriousð€
Life is not qualified by fluent English or
branded clothes. It is measured by the number of faces who smile when they hear your name.
ððœððœððœððœððœððœððœððœððœððœððœð°ð°ð°ð°ð°ð°ð°ð°ð°ð°ð°ðððððð
If a whole BBN can be sponsored by Abegð€
Who am I not to beg you people for money.
My sister giving a good salary to your house help doesn’t mean treating her well… Atleast give her 1 day off every week to go quench her thirst, or else she will drink from your tapð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£ð€£…
I hope you understand?
Ladies who changes position during sex without being told,
May u receive ur financial breakthrough this month.
ðð
What a relief
Good evening my fellow future billionaires.
I know poverty will tell Someone to skip this post.ð€·ðŒ
No more Amebo again bcus We don’t know who is pregnant again..all this girls just carry big Belle
ð€
Them comot my Rib create you,
Show me breast E turn problem
ð
If u can’t send her transportation fare ….ð€žð€žð€žð€žð€ž Please date the girl on your Street.
ðµðµðµðµ
Dating hausa girl is very stressful u will be hearing “Hamisu” Hamisu”
Not knowing dat she’s trying to say
“I miss u”ð
Favour na relationship u wan do abi na my polo u come pack.
Talk to með
Ordinary injection you’re cryingð but if it’s 6inches you will be shouting deeper deeper jisie Ike… Nwa deeper lifeðð¶ðŒââïž
Always be thankful to your mother
What if she was not in the mood ðð that night
ððð
See as one edo girl fill her JAMB Form;
Name: Mercy Edofiagbo
Age: 19
Sex: 5 times daily
Until you start paying house rent, you won’t understand why the prodigal son came back.
My next girlfriend I will love you from the bottom of my kidney. let my heart rest small abeg !!!ð
My guy open shop for girlfriend, customer marry her
Customer is always right ð
Stop fighting the other woman,
Your husband is the real home breaker,
If he values you, he will stay one place
But u need to tighten it..
I Don’t Know Who Need To Hear ð This ð
No Matter How Hungry You Are, Never Let A Parrot ðŠ Feed You. ð
Pride has a way of gradually turning a person into a fool without knowing ð¥
Stay away from friends that makes you feel your Man isn’t doing enough for you.
My dear, it’s not easy anywhere!
Dear Married Men, Stop Telling other ladies dat u You’re not Happy in ur Marriage While ur Wife Keeps Getting Pregnantð
My neighbors will not seem stop surprising me..
If you are looking for a wife material please go for a lady above 30 because their sense has come back to factory settings.
What and elder sees sitting down sometimes fit be Nonsense.
Reason amð€
ðð
Any man dat’s asking u out as a married woman is only testing u to no de level of ur stupidity dat’s not love ð
My Sister
No be to buy iphone and wear classy clothes and shoes.
My question is when last did you treat infection?
Share to help someone
If u re wearing leggings as a lady, kindly wear a top dat goes down a bit.
Help brothers to runðthis heavenly race in Peace
She’s now pregnant because when the first pregnancy test came negative, they celebrate it with Sex
ððð
Honestly if marriage certificate can Expire like Drivers license most men will not renew it
ðDating a sugar daddy when you don’t know your father is dangerous..ð€
Anambra girls will zoom ur picðð
To c if there is money in your pocket
B4 dey accept ur frnd requestððŒââïžððŒââïžððŒââïž
Where re d Geography students?
Please wat is d Name of that Starð«we see after receiving HOT SLAP
ðð
So No wedding this Saturday ð«
How i wan take eat riceððð
Never use anyone’s poor background to control and abuse them. Poor background does not mean poor future.
Tables can turn.
You no get nyash, you wear trouser dey raise your polo up, wetin you wan show me?
Your spinal cord ??
Money donât impress me ðð giving it to me do ð
Some people be so fine but smelling like MACKEREL ð€£ðis like i go dey trek instead of entering public transport
The more i get to know people,the more i realize why Noah only let animals enter the Ark
If not for Konji wey dey catch boys,
Some girls no deserve “Hi” at all.
ððð
People call it karma, but the Bible says ð£ïžð£ïž you will Reap what you sow â¢â¢â¢
If u can’t speak English plss speak ur language.
Wic one is “Happy birthday dear, your days re numbered”
I tire ooð
ðð
My neighbor phone got stolen yesterday, please how long should I wait before asking him to dash me his Charger?
ð€ð€ðð
Bring ur money
Let me keep for u
Nah so our mama take do their own yahooð€
Na mumu dey take “favour, precious, chidinma and joy as serious Girlfriend.
ðð
ððð
Make una dey try answer names una fit Carry oo..ð
Dem beat God’s power today.
ðð
He bought you fried rice, chicken and yoghurt since then u can’t take him off ur mind.
U re not in love.
U re hungry
ðð
For formication you dey bill me 10kð something wey chisos go still punish me untop.
ðð
Please, before you tell anyone your Problem, make sure the person is not a public speaker or a writer on Facebook.
Marry a beautiful wife so that when you go to family gatherings, she will be asked to prepare Salad and not to wash intestines of Goats and Cow.ðð€£ð€£
To our Muslim brothers dat didn’t give us meat,
Mary is four months pregnant we will do you backðð
Apart from Chicken Republic, tantalizers, Mr Biggs and ShopRite, Which other female hospital do you know?..ð€
Girls wit big breast re calm and friendly, but u see those once wit pimples on their chest..Hmm.
They re naturally wicked Oo
ð
My experience thou
My school teacher taught me most of the lies I tell today, she would tell me to write a letter to my uncle abroad when she knows my uncle is in the village
ð€£ð€£ð€£
If you’re a lady reading this and you’re ready to settle down, may God bless you with ODOGWU and not Odiegwu
Whatever that black bra did to you,
Forgive and forget ððœ
Buy a new one!
Don’t look for a virgin as wife, get a woman with good manners;
virginity ends in one night but good manners last forever.
â€ïžâ€ïž
After spending close money on her birthday.
On my own turn wat I get is clear road for my king..
OGE stop clearing road for me oo I no dey stay inside bushðð
A relationship should be “I water u, u water me, we grow together. Not ” I water u, I water u, I still dey water youð
I wonder how Obi Cubana usually sleep or cope with his wealth, me ordinary 30k that I have, everybody is looking like thief in my eyes
I Once Cried Of Heartbreak But After Eating Owerri Bole with fish,& Chilled coke, I Later Realized it was Hunger.
If your nigga keeps cheating on you with the same chic, humble yourself and ask that side-chic for some advice. ð€·ðœââïžthere is something you are not doing right
Teach your sons that cooking and cleaning are basic life skills not gender roles.ð
Hope d volume is okay
Teach your sons that cooking and cleaning are basic life skills not gender roles.ð
Hope d volume is okay
I thought been a pastor is a calling…
Imagine them sack you from your calling.
That means na flashingð
Before you forgive her for cheating,remember she was moaning for himð§ ð€š
And she put it back in very fast after it slipped out…
SAD!ðððð
My friend travelled out on an official duty.
She was expected to spend 5 days, but as fate would have it,
the program only took 3 days and she could not reach her
husband on phone because her phone battery was dead so
she decided to return home unannounced.
When she got home, her children told her that their father had
a female visitor the moment she left and the lady has been
with them since then.
She was already infuriated and inquired the lady’s
whereabouts.
They told her, the lady was in the visitor’s room.
She went and peepped; lo and behold the lady was there and
was even tying her wrapper.
She quietly went to the kitchen and boiled water in her very
big kettle.
As the water was boiling, her husband drove in and when he
came into the house, he went straight to the visitor’s room
calling out ‘my love I’m home’. Unknown to him, his wife was
home.
My friend was even more angered when she heard his voice
and said to herself ‘today, God must receive 2 visitors today.
She took the boiling water and made garri for them (herself,
husband and her mother in-law) to eat
I know you like stories, especially the ones
that touch the heart .
That is the end of my story….ð¶ð»ââïžð¶ð»ââïžð¶ð»ââïž
Since I came back around 7pm yesterday evening, my heart has been beating very fast , so I con dey wonder why my heart dey beat like this
I decided to make a research, I opened my bag and counted the money inside, I just discovered the groundnut i bought while coming home, I gave the woman 1,000naira instead of 100naira
As I am talking to you now, my blood pressure has increased ….I am having high fever ð¢ð¢
Even d groundnut no sweet someone should come to my rescue oooðððð
Once In a While ð¥ºð¥º
Remove 2k from that money you’re Savingâºïžâºïž
Take a Walk to the Woman / Mallam Selling Roasted Chicken or Cat Fish ðð
Tell her to give you 2 Laps or One Plate ð¥µð¥µ
Tell her to Package It On TakeAway ð€ð€
On Your Way Home ð¥ºð¥º Buy Hollandia Yogurt ðð
When You Get home Lock Your Door âºïžâºïž
Off Your Clothes ð€ð€
Play “Timaya I Can’t Kill Myself Song ” ð¥µð¥µ
Please Don’t Sit on the Chair ð¥Žð¥Ž
Spread on the Floor and make sure you tear that Chicken / Fish as You Listen To the Song ðð
Then Dilute It With Hollandia Yogurt ð¥³ð¥³
Problem No Dey Finish For This World ð€ð€
So Don’t Kill Yourself Trying to Solve Everything Without Taking a Break to Relax And Enjoy ð¥µð¥µ
Are You With Me??ð€ð€ð¥Žð¥³ð
Anytime my friend see Nigerian police doing recruitment, he will remember his 1st & final attempt.
They were told to run 200meters, he tried his best to be the best & took 1st, Only for him to be slapped severally & disqualified that he was running ð like a THIEF & not a police ð® ð ðð
Reduce the Volume Of Your FAKE LIFE , Make your Helper No Go Dey Call you Mentor !!!
My sister,
If your boyfriend hide you like weed…
My dear hide him like your tear tear pant
I don’t like nonsenseð€£ð€£ð€£
A woman calls her husband who has gone to work.
Woman: Baby, buy me Yam at the market when U get back from work.
Husband: OK. But I gave you the money when I left the house this morning, right?
Woman: Yes, baby. I’m tired. Do that for me, sorry!
Husband: OK, see you later.
a few minutes later, the husband calls the woman back.
Husband: Honey, help! Come quickly, to the market. The lady selling the yam grabbed me by the neck and said that I was responsible for her pregnancy.
Woman: What? Baby I’m coming in a minute.
arrived at the market she calls her husband to know his position.
Woman: Hello baby, I’m already here. Where are you ?
Husband: I’m still at work. Buy your yam and go home quietly.
ð
There are plenty ways to handle ur woman.. mustn’t be by gragra and quarrelð€
Assuming you were offered 2million to beat me up, ðð
Don’t Tell me you will accept that stupid offer ðð¥ºð¥º, it’s me oooh ð©ðªðª
Baby where is this Relationship heading to??
ME: Anywhere fuel finish I go drop youð
ðð
Dating many guys is a way of confusing your enemies from attacking the one you want to marryð
But guys will not understandðââ
The problem of dating a guy Abroad is that u don’t know how many of u are waiting for him to come back ð€£ ð€£ð€£
Girls will just come to your house and think they can have any of your property.
This one carried my Follow-come Charger and within 2 weeks Iâve bought 3 chargers.
Ebube you will purge inside traffic ð
Even if it is too small,know how to use it to satisfy ur woman
I am talking about ur salary o
Stop crushing on people’s boyfriends. Tell ur boyfrnd 2 bath wel, dress nice, eat balanced diet & stay away 4rm weed & tramadol.ð
EDO man returns wife to her parents, says her VIRGINA IS WIDE.
Me: Trailer Don pass for Keke lane….
Baby pls manage this 20k for not calling you yesterday that’s how real MEN apologize.
ladies am I communicating?
ððð€·ðŒ
Ask for her Account number and send her money.
Not Everytime, “How was your night”..Person wey no get money dey sleep?ð
Deeper Life Nigeria putting on trouser to Church is not allowed. Deeper Life UK/US trouser is allowed.
Who is fooling who now? Nigerians ndo!
It is only in Nigeria second Wife will be accusing husband for cheating,
IF the idiot did not cheat will u be his WIFE
ððð
Before Money was introduced,
What did women find interesting in MEN??
ðð
I’m not in the mood to post anything,
I lost my 2000 naira on Tuesday,
Who did i offend??ð€·ð»ðð
Stop saying they stole ur girlfriend. Where were you wen she needed 2k urgently?
Gudmoney ooð
Wen ur boyfriend cooks & wash d utensils, he’s romantic. Bt wen ur brodr does dsame tin to his girlfriend, its witchcraft.
ðð
My boyfriend cheated on me, I must cheat on him too”
AUNTY NA LIE
Ashawo first dey ur eye before
ðððð
As at today,I don’t know what to post anymore,I am only left with people’s secrets
Make I post am?
ð
It’s not about having big nyash, my question is,
DO YOU HAVE MONEY TO PAY FOR TWO SEATS?ð€·ð»,
Nobody should press me again ooð
I done buy the RINGðbut kneeling down in front of a Girl I senior is d Problem ooðð
Good wife should be like…..Welcome my husband, food is ready. Will u hmmmðb4 u eat or will u eat b4 u hmmm*
ððððððð
Baby come to my house……
Baby come to my house….
My brother what exactly is happening in your house? Or should i mind my bizness
ðððð
My wedding vows will be simple nd short.
“Agnes, as I’m abt to marry u, pls don’t kill me b4 my Time”.
Girls ‘II be like, all I want from him is “CARE, ATTENTION, SUPPORT & HONESTY..
Now put all d first letters together( ðµ )
ðð
Don’t eat well oooohh,
Be using ur money to buy drugs to last on someone’s
Daughter. idiot.
Dating for long is not a reason to marryð©ââ€ïžâðš you, someone can spent 7 years in medical ðšschool and later become….ð€·ðœ DJ
Don’t marry a man cuz of his wealth, even in wealth some women cryðfor Divorce.
Marriage is about happiness
ðð
DURING SEX SOME Girls will be like…baby please don cum inside ooh
They think it’s easy to jump out from a running vehicleððððð
What is the purpose of using waist beads if your stomach will cover it?ð
Wahala be like ashawo work
E nor dey had to startð€£
What do Ladies usually draw on a Man’s chest wen Demanding for money Bikonu ??
ððð
A real woman will stay awake all night just to make sure mosquitoes don’t disturb her husband.
I love my husband no be for mouth bikoo
You were dating him, he married another lady and you are still dating him.
What is really wrong with you?
Wetin i no go see for front sit
I have kidnapped myself, u people should bring 3million naira or else I will remain in dat uncompleted building Oo.
ðð
Devil is such an idiot, wen u wnt 2 stop fornicating, boom one girl will just call u & say ” you dey house ð”?
And I wasn’t trained to tell lies ,and turning her down is another sin ð€§ð€§
For those who knows me i hate lies
U that lost your virginity because of blackberry curve 2
Now that iPhone 12 is out I wonder what u will lose, maybe ur kidney
If your wife is sick don’t rush her to the hospital always apply FIRST AID by crediting her ACCOUNT! alert heals women faster.
Please that money u want to use nd buy cloths Pls take 500 from it nd buy Roll-On
, stop frustrating us with ur body odor ð
She posted feeling sad and u rushed to comment wats wrong??
Its like u have 2k u re not usingðð
I told my Girlfriend I’d like to have 7kids after marriage and she shouted..Ah babe! That is too much naa’..” In my mind I was like.,
“What’s wrong with this one,
Are you my future WIFE??
ðð
ðððððððððð
Ladies if you really want to be successful in life Fuck us, ðsorry I mean Focus
ðð
If you know the number of girls using your boyfriend’s towel,
You will know that the pimples on your face are not natural.ð€£ð€£ð€£
I swear women have this hidden talent called “let me upset him today.
ððð
But i am an overcomer
I was shocked when l saw my neighbor wearing Earrings & l asked him: âAre you ok?. He replied and said, âI started wearing them the day my wife found them in my car, l said they are mine ðððð
Aunty if I toast you, you duty is to say YES or NO.
Wic one is “what of ur GF?
U wan poison her??
ð
I wish I had plenty money instead of this big preek I am carrying up and downð
So you are dating a Dj and expect him not to cheat? Someone who can mix three songs at the same time..
My sister wake up..
Always visit your boyfriend on skirt, e get why ðð
ððð¶
If u don’t make time for ur wife sum1 else will. Ask Adam he left Eve alone for 2min nd d snake took her for launchð
If our Girlfriends know the amount of girls we ignore daily bcuz of them.
THEY WILL PAY US SALARY.
Am I communicating?ð
Some guys can deceive…
They’ll be like “Baby, i see my future kids in your eyes” Weldone sir chairman of national population commission. Hope you are seeing golden morn, pampers, school fees and other baby food on her forehead too?* ððð
Please if he is not touching you in the right places, hold his hand and direct him to where you want him to touch. Don’t be shy ð
Na person wey deserve respect we go respect ð
Your age is your business ð
Ladies with small Bress are only good at shouting ððð
A good pusssy must have walls oo! It must also have step at the entrance. if it doesn’t have, then stop doing shakara ðð
No matter what you are going through in life,
Please have s.ex
A guy can b sick, and when you go check on him , he will still knack you joinððð
Eweeee, earpod of 130k no gree sound again.. I just hope say na me deaf ððð
Never gang up against the innocent. Your reward is going to be disgraceful no matter how long it takes..
May Death Not Make Us Famous. Let People Hear Of Us While We Are Alive Positively IN JESUS NAME ðâ¥ïž
Fasting doesn’t stop you from brushing your teeth pls, I beg u in the name of God, brush ur teeth before leaving ur house ððð
AVOID GIRLS WITH SMALL BREAST
Sex No Dey Tire Them ððð
A Child Is Not A Reason To Stay With Someone,
Sometimes The Child Is The Reason To Move On To
Provide a Better Lifestyle For Them.
Nawa for this country o. Person go finish University come dey learn handwork from person wey no finish Primary School ð€£ð€£ðð
I buy jean 19k,you say make I lap youð€·ââïž.
You wan sit on grace ð€·ââïž
Girls who fight their fellow girls over a boy,
How are you doing tonight?
Stop dating people who makes you wear your weekend clothes during the weekð€£
Stop judging people for the same thing you did because you kept yours a secret
If we ladies won Cum, make una no dey quick remove PREEK.
E DEY SABI PAIN USðð¢ð
No matter how deep the love is…..he will finger you and smell it….ð€·ââïž
Guys who touch pussy while kissing, may God bless you financially.
ð·ð
Stop holding grudges against me
I may have wronged you unknowingly, open up and tell me, i will apologies i am not perfectð€·
Sometimes in life , you donât need encouragement, motivation, inspiration or love.
You just need someone to give you money.
Some people are like birds,You help them to fly and once they are in the air…they shitð© on Your head.ð
No matter how angry you are at someone, never expose the problems and secrets they shared with you.
It speaks a lot about you
A real man will help you without asking for Sexx but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t know what to do âºïž
DEAR GOD AFTER MY STRUGGLE TO MAKE IT. LET ME LIVE LONG ðð¿
Other tribes: Wetin man go do
Akwa Ibom: werin mango ru âºïž
ðââïžðââïžðââïž
People who you cut off will never tell the full story,they will just tell people the part that makes you a bad person.
E get how raw knacking go sweet you reach, you will be like “shey highest thing na baby, make she born am” ðððð
Some issues are meant to be solved na*ked ðð
Dis life nor really balance at all.
The more people dey hate you dey go, new set of people dey replace the space
If you have not drank your postinor2, do it now… 72hours go soon pass… ððð
The day I will upload a picture of my boo,the blind will see,the deaf will hear,those who are mad will become Normal.
If Those Babes Called “DORCAS” Catch U 4 Bed, My Brother Just Call Ur Next Of Kin Tell Am Where D Rest Of Ur Property Dey. ðð
The Moment You Look Back During DOGGY! ðð
And You See Him Holding His Nose. ððð
A poor man’s greeting is always mistaken for begging.
May you never be poor! ð¥º
This money is unisex.
Try and get your own ð°
Dating a neighbor is nonsense, you be receiving texts like: “Babe is everything okay i saw you coming from the toilet..”
Don’t be depressed….. get data on your phone & come online we will make you laugh with our nonsense… we also have loads of problem but we put it behind us
No room for depression we move*ðââïž
Deep down they know you are a good person,but envy and jealousy will never allow them love you and speak good of you.
I don’t gossip you, na u wey no dey around when I was talking about you ðð
U get Belle Dem engage you, u come dey shout “I SAID YES”… As if u get choice, u fit say no before? ððð
Total friends: 5000
Active friends: 200
Unactive friends:100
CCTV CAMERA: 4,700ð³ðð
I pity my future daughter
Which lie wey she go use comot for house wey I no Sabi âºïžðð
2 Years Ago I Remember Saying “Ewwwwwwwwwww I Will Never Suck DICK Now I Am Whole Vacuum Cleaner” ðð
Some people just de take wetin u post here personal like say u borrow their phone take post am even this one too them fit still take am personal
Her Nipple Is Salty Because Her BRA IS DIRTY ððð
Someone that got F9 in chemistry na your body cream plug abi
Women don’t Apologize,
They explain until u become guilty
ðð
Some guys can form sha. Carrying Laptop bag wit LUDO inside ð
ð
Weed is illegal but Razler have NAFDAC number.
This story no clearð
Dating me is stressful.I no sabi cuddle,
Small hug u Don collect one round.
ðð
Always Drink Garri with Onions so that if garri wan blind your Eyes, Onions go open themð¥Žð¥Ž
Before u call a guy ugly
Remember that 95% of your beauty can be wiped with a handkerchief ðð
Na who get money dey know whether bank get issues
You don see me insult any bank since?ð¹ð¹ð¹
Who wants to go on a date with me?
Bills on me
Just run when I runð¹